Brutal Review: Brutal Legend

OK enough of this shit! Yea! so Brutal Legend looks great, really good story, great voice acting. Totally agree, but let me tell you how it really breaks down. This is an RTS game, a very frustrating RTS game it took over 3 or more hours to beat a "boss" It's not because I sucked at the game, it's because I never played an RTS game before. So sue me, but here is another thing that "crawls up my crack" the driving in this game is awful:( OMG seriously? There is side mission if you can believe it or not where you have to get beer to a party. Hard to believe huh? But anyways, you have a minuet and half or maybe 2 minuets to get it to the party. Here is my "issue" with this. Driving controls suck, oh did I forget to mention if you run into something like an obstacle it will start to rupture the beer kegs. If the beer kegs explode then have the "option" of playing the mission? I tried twice and gave up. Why? because your Duce Mobile gets caught on every obstacle in the game. I can't tell you how many times I caught on a rock or scenery in the game. And wtf? Eddie can't jump?
So you spend most of your time in the Duce Mobile, oh did I mention you have to "summon" it every-time? Sure you upgrade you car, at one point you can put homing missiles on the car. Huh? Homing Missiles seriously? I couldn't take down a "mutated deer" with one, not to mention that the back ground environment is not destructible.

Now my next grip is the "so called" side missions BORING! except the one where you go hunting animals for Brian Posehn.

The rest consist of 1.ambushing enemy troops 2.You have to play "wing man" for one of your allies. 3. Racing Missions which happens to be the same character over and over again. Other than a trophy? You get bragging rights and that's about it.

Now granted you don't have to do the side missions, but in order to earn "fire tributes" you kinda need to do them.

The guitar mini-game:
OMG! is the frustrating! You have to get the mini game right, if you mis a cord you guitar which goes by the name of Clementine gets hot? Which I don't understand?

OK let me try to explain this, when I battled against Lyon Whyite which is play on words of the band "White Lyon" voiced by Rob Halford of Judas Priest fame. Which originally was supposed to voiced by Ronnie James Dio?
You have these things called "stage battles" and this where the RTS part comes in.

I am not going to go in tons of detail, because it would spoil the game. But as Eddie you have play a chord on your guitar called "fan support" to basically raise what the game calls a "merchant booth" and you have to play this cord every time and one the hardest cords to play in the game. And if you fuck it up, Clementine overheats. And then you have to wait till she cools down, to try the cord again? Did I mention this in middle of battle?

This Is why I hate RTS games, I just get a "merch booth" up and enemies tear it down, and then I have to rebuild it. OMG! talk about frustrating.